I have some great friends. Time and time again they have been there to help me with Kayla whether it be looking after her for a few hours or sharing an understanding ear as I vent about the latest autism-related issue. Like me, over the past few years they have all gained tremendous insight into what it is like to have a child with special needs and have shown a tremendous amount of empathy and support. This week I had a friend mention something about “trying to plan things around Kayla so that a particular event could have had more impact”. My response was pretty simple: I can plan everything to the best of my ability and try to control Kayla’s environment so that it makes it easier for her but it can all be for naught: I never know when Kayla might have an emotional meltdown and not be able to hold it together. That is what it is like having a child with autism – incredibly unpredictable.
Needless to say, bringing Kayla to a restaurant, movie, sporting event, or theater production can be extremely stressful and anxiety provoking – not just for Kayla but also for me due to the unpredictability. Crowds, noise, and lighting all can have impact on children with autism and Kayla is no exception. She wears headphones to the movies and sporting events to muffle noise levels and she gets very stressed in large crowds or if there is a lot of commotion. How many social events or activities geared for children do you know that are not relatively loud, crowded or involve a lot of commotion? Exactly.
Thus you might understand how excited both Kayla and I were when we learned that the Flynn Center for Performance Arts was going to be showing a specially adapted show of the “Cat in the Hat” for children who are on the autism spectrum or have sensitivity issues. In the upcoming Cat in the Hat, they are going to decrease the sound, dim the lighting, and have relaxed seating policies. They are even offering headphones and weighted blankets for children that might need them during the performance. They will also have activities out in the lobby for children to engage with if they need a break from the show and have gone so far as to offer gluten free snacks at the snack bar.
This is not a new effort by the Flynn by any means. Over the past few years, the Flynn has gone above and beyond to enhance their understanding of autism and the impact it has on children within the community. They recently had Puppets in Education come do a performance on what it is like to have autism. This performance was not for the public, it was for the Flynn staff members! Not only have they educated themselves about the autism, they have begun to incorporate accommodations into the performances they have at their theater. The Flynn has been working on having a “commitment to sensory-friendly programming” for several years now. This has been evident by the programs that they offered this past fall, “Red Kite, Brown Box” which were designed to be sensory-friendly for children with autism or any sensitivity.
We live in a community that is filled with children with special needs. It is enlightening for me to see how the Flynn is taking the steps to educate all their staff on autism and that they are on making their performances more sensory-friendly. I believe this will have a powerful impact on children and families living with autism in our community. I know it will on my family.
I would love to go out to restaurants, movies, activities, events and do such activities with never a thought or concern. Prior to Kayla coming into our lives, like most families we went out frequently with our older child and had a great time. We still do as a family but it is much more difficult. Before there were never meltdowns, no wearing headphones, no planning or “social stories”. Nobody stared at us because I did not have a child who was wearing headphones, had braces on her leg, flapped her arms, and was prone to having meltdowns. Before Kayla, we were a “normal” family and as such we were invisible. It was easy. It was stress-free for all of us.
With Kayla, that just isn’t possible under normal circumstances. It is one of the difficult unsaid challenges of having a child on the autism scale or who is sensory-challenged. Attending “The Cat in the Hat” will be not be without some stress both for Kayla or me but my anxiety level will be at all time low! All because the Flynn Center for Performing Arts is making the effort to accommodate children who are on the autism spectrum. It won’t matter if Kayla is wearing headphones, not sitting in her chair, flapping her arms, or if she has a meltdown, because there will be other families that children might exhibit the same behavior. These families know and understand what it is like to live with a child with autism. And for one performance of the “Cat in the Hat”, my family will be able to relax and enjoy a show being “normal” or “invisible”. I cannot tell you how much I look forward to that and I cannot thank the Flynn enough for that opportunity.